liveonthesun: (Default)
[personal profile] liveonthesun
yoooo it's been like four years exactly since i've maintained this thing, but i've really been wanting to get back into journalling. i tried to on lj a few times, but it always made me feel sad for the friendships that had been developed and then lost over the years, and it held a lot of emotional baggage, so maybe starting with a fresh slate will help?

last week was spring break for britt and so i took the week off to spend from work to spend time with her. we went roller-skating and hiking and watched a lot of rupaul's drag race (which i have A LOT of thoughts about) and got some much needed housework and yardwork done. roller-skating was a lot of fun, and i was really bad at it, but it made me miss those 3 months i kind of did derby 5 years ago. if i wasn't juggling school + work + trying to get pregnant right now, i'd probably sign up for atlanta roller girls right now. i think i'm going to next summer, though. like, i think it will be a really good thing to make sure i stay active and get out after having a baby and while being a stay-at-home mom. i have the tendency to become reclusive if i don't have something forcing me out of the house regularly, and i worry it will kick in when i'm not working anymore, especially since i might have to go off my anti-depressants. i'm trying to plan things now to prepare for when the time comes.

back to those rupaul thoughts, tho!

it makes me miss dressing up and caring about how i looked? i go back and forth between being proud of myself for not spending a lot of time and money on clothes/make-up etc., but also really wishing i had the time and money to have a carefully curated wardrobe and amazing make-up every day. this battle also symbolizes so many things for me -- fiscal responsibility, quaker simplicity, refusing patriarchal standards, anti-consumerism, etc. but god, i miss being pretty. though, really, every attempt i make at wearing make-up, shaving, etc. dies within like a week because i'm too lazy? and in the end the laziness wins out.

RPDR has also been making me think a lot about my dream of opening a queer library. it's something i've always wanted to do -- a mix between a library and a museum, where the collection focuses mainly on works by/about LGBTQ folks and also displays pieces of local queer history. RPDR specifically has made me want to start a collection of atlanta drag history. i would love to house a public collection of videos and pictures of drag shows and queens going back as far as possible.

i would also love to have a recording both set up where queer people could just come in and record their stories, either about their personal lives or atlanta queer culture or whatever they thought would be good for other people to know. and i'd like to have a collection of photo albums of pictures that people donate of themselves or queer family members from over the years.

i don't even know how or when i'd ever be able to start such a project? how do you even begin to start a stand-alone library outside of a public library system? or maybe when i have my MLS i can pitch it to the county, like, "hey. i think we need a queer branch, and i really wanna take that on." i think about this possible library so much, and if nothing else, i'd like to buy a beautiful old house when i retire and make it a public gathering space for queer history to exist.

Date: 2017-04-12 05:32 pm (UTC)
rocket_to_neptune: (Default)
From: [personal profile] rocket_to_neptune
I totally get the reclusive thing. I have a similar tendency. My mom was straight out agoraphobic, so I'm trying to avoid it. Get out! Do fun things! Even if it just means sitting on the porch or in the yard with a book.

I think about my appearance too, when I watch RPDR. These ladies are GORGEOUS! Ha. I'm nowhere near as make-up proficient. Totally jealous. And I can't walk in heals. Haha.

I also love their stories and histories. The show features really amazing people.

Date: 2017-04-13 11:27 am (UTC)
rocket_to_neptune: (Default)
From: [personal profile] rocket_to_neptune
Aw. That sucks. What brand were they?

I've had the most success with kitten heels, but even then...These days when I shop for shoes, I like the kind that have "diabetic friendly" in the description. Ha. They aren't the most attractive or sexy shoes, however.

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